FARMHOUSE DOGS
19 May 2008
Imagine yourself as a guest in a farmhouse B&B.
The farmer and his wife are already ensconced, together with their children in their beamy farmhouse kitchen. There is an irresistible smell of bacon coming from the AGA.
I hope, dear reader, that you are salivating happily.
Now comes the question. Would you expect to find also in the kitchen, the farmer's dog?
Picture the dog. A wiry and intelligent animal on the floor in front of the AGA, hoping (probably vainly) for a small snippet of bacon to polish off a satisfactory early breakfast.
So far as I am concerned, at least, the dog represents an addition to the scene. No farmhouse kitchen complete without one.
But I much regret to tell you that this is now a thing of the past -- a mere nostalgic fantasy.
The Health and Safety inspectors have determined that dogs and farmhouse kitchens are not compatible with one another.
Goodness knows what appalling disaster these dear, well-intentioned inspectors imagine will flow from the canine presence in the farmhouse kitchen.
But, whatever the reason, it must certainly be deep. For the rule is absolute. Faced with the prospect of such a beast in such a place, the inspectors have reached for the regulatory gun.
I know this because one farmer who runs a B&B was recently asked to confirm in writing that their dog would not at any time enter the kitchen. If no such assurance could be given - no B&B.
The interesting point, of course, is what all this implies about the attitude of our esteemed regulators towards the customer.
Naturally, one would accept a ruling from the health and safety gurus that you wouldn't expect a dog in the kitchen of the Ritz. But, unless they regard the potential customer as a complete idiot, they would presumably assume that the customer in a farmhouse B&B is aware that he or she is not dining at the Ritz.
I mean, if you were having breakfast in a farmhouse would you be unaware of the likelihood that there might be a canine presence? Would it not occur to you, when planning your stay, as in general terms likely that a holiday in a farmhouse might involve coming into contact with..............animals?
And wouldn't you take it as a rather comforting sign that you were sharing breakfast with a family that presumably doesn't want to poison itself? After all, in the Ritz, the kitchen is occupied by people who may never eat its products. But the farmer and his family are right there, so you might think they were confident about the helfansafety of the situation -- unless, of course, you were a helfansafety inspector.
My conclusion is that this particular aspect of the world has gone stark, staring mad.
The farmer and his wife are already ensconced, together with their children in their beamy farmhouse kitchen. There is an irresistible smell of bacon coming from the AGA.
I hope, dear reader, that you are salivating happily.
Now comes the question. Would you expect to find also in the kitchen, the farmer's dog?
Picture the dog. A wiry and intelligent animal on the floor in front of the AGA, hoping (probably vainly) for a small snippet of bacon to polish off a satisfactory early breakfast.
So far as I am concerned, at least, the dog represents an addition to the scene. No farmhouse kitchen complete without one.
But I much regret to tell you that this is now a thing of the past -- a mere nostalgic fantasy.
The Health and Safety inspectors have determined that dogs and farmhouse kitchens are not compatible with one another.
Goodness knows what appalling disaster these dear, well-intentioned inspectors imagine will flow from the canine presence in the farmhouse kitchen.
But, whatever the reason, it must certainly be deep. For the rule is absolute. Faced with the prospect of such a beast in such a place, the inspectors have reached for the regulatory gun.
I know this because one farmer who runs a B&B was recently asked to confirm in writing that their dog would not at any time enter the kitchen. If no such assurance could be given - no B&B.
The interesting point, of course, is what all this implies about the attitude of our esteemed regulators towards the customer.
Naturally, one would accept a ruling from the health and safety gurus that you wouldn't expect a dog in the kitchen of the Ritz. But, unless they regard the potential customer as a complete idiot, they would presumably assume that the customer in a farmhouse B&B is aware that he or she is not dining at the Ritz.
I mean, if you were having breakfast in a farmhouse would you be unaware of the likelihood that there might be a canine presence? Would it not occur to you, when planning your stay, as in general terms likely that a holiday in a farmhouse might involve coming into contact with..............animals?
And wouldn't you take it as a rather comforting sign that you were sharing breakfast with a family that presumably doesn't want to poison itself? After all, in the Ritz, the kitchen is occupied by people who may never eat its products. But the farmer and his family are right there, so you might think they were confident about the helfansafety of the situation -- unless, of course, you were a helfansafety inspector.
My conclusion is that this particular aspect of the world has gone stark, staring mad.
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